faith

                  NO MORE STRESS. PLEASE! Can't we have just one day?-- one full day of existence without having to talk, to think, or to stress about anything? Not the visas, not the travel, not the wasted time, nor the complications, just nothing. Can't we have just one day of that liberty? We talk about favor upon favor and we believe, but the rest of the world has conjured up just enough negative vibes to make us feel everyday is a challenge-- at least that's what I feel. With time flying fast I wonder if all these hindrances, all these walls, all these booty traps we've been facing here and there and everywhere would be able to get us done in time for the deadline. Why does this even feel like a mouse race when it's not supposed to be one? Why is it when everything seems to go perfectly well, a sudden problem arises and makes it all complicated? From the clerical error, down to the RA 9048, and then the dedication to the approval of dedication certificates. I wonder what could be worse. And the main problem is not even in the documents (except for the petition paper) its the people that are the main problem. The people working here and there, the people who can't get simple things done, the people who are trying to do their jobs but fail at it, the people-- the ignorant, unspecific, and feeling "right" people. When did government employees, servants of the law and of the people, start turning to demanding bosses that think of themselves as the law? Even Jesus who is God did not come down to earth to be served, but to serve. To be able to serve others is the biggest privilege one could ever have yet none-- not even servants of the law realize that. Come on, I know we are all humans, imperfect, and at times we are simply tired, but that is no good reason for someone especially someone working for the government to get all demanding and fired up for a simple document. It's a good thing that amidst all this stress, all these troubles, and all these worries we face ten times a day, we know our God is faithful, our God is greater, and our God is more than willing to turn around this situation for us. The rest of the world may put worry and disappointment on a platter for us, but everything happens for a reason, and God always has the right timing for everything even for reasons we do not yet know. So this day I decided I will not be stressed, I will not think about it, I will not fear, because I know I have Someone big who is up there to back me up when I need some backing up.

metaphors

                  I haven't been in here since--well, since I last posted which is like almost two months ago. A lot has come and gone, I can't really say it's good to be back because honestly I'm quite stressed, which is the main reason why i'm here writing and I don't even want to talk about how I could just write down in my journal because seriously, I've been keeping this up for so long, and it's adding to the stress. Okay, so that was a major stress-inducing line I just wrote. Anyways, so yeah, a lot has come and gone but the one thing that would never leave me so far, is the crazy, contagious, stress that has been building itself up. (Another stress-inducing line) Forgive me for all this ruckus that I'm well deliberate about causing, it's just so hard, having no one to talk to-- or having someone to talk to, but not really someone who could help nor understand my situation. Let me just say it is so hard to be a Filipino citizen! Seriously. And I don't even mean to be racial or something, its just a fact I have learned to take in for the two months I've been processing papers. It is that easy for an American to come here in the Philippines, or other countries, while it is equally difficult for us Filipinos to go to U.S.A or other non-Asian countries. And I won't even expound on how unfair it feels because it is unfair. Sure, it's all comply this and that, and like what a friend of my mom told me "It's as simple as submitting requirements for a school project", and honestly it is, its a no-brainer. You just have to get the right documents and submit them. As simple as that. But my oh my, is it well-versed in simple complications, everything and everyone is strict about everything. Don't get me wrong, of course every nation or country needs to be strict about everything especially if its not just a tourist visa, who knows one might be a syndicate or worse, a terrorist. But its all just complicated crap. Its like trying to submit a blank sheet of paper to your English teacher for a graduation requirement, but the blank sheet of paper doesn't happen to be just any paper, it should have its own brand, white in color, with a specific size, with a specific width, with specific weight and eco features, and you'd have to submit it on time for someone to pick it up, and your grade doesn't come after a few days, it comes after a couple of weeks when everything is sorted out, and when the teacher has agreed that the paper you just sent, was exactly the paper he was looking for-- which I failed to mention is a personalized, paper that happens to be non-existing. You'd have to pre-order the paper, and get the resources for yourself, which is technically located in different areas of the state, and no, an online order doesn't count. So, instead of just buying an Oxford paper from the Paper store, you'd have to literally travel far to get the raw materials, one by one, have them processed at a manufacturer and wait for several days until the paper is out. Then you'd need to have a brand for the paper like every other product, file for it, wait until the file is granted, only then can you submit the paper to your English teacher. But it doesn't end there, because when your teacher discovers that your sheet of paper has a spec or a tiny crease, he gives it back to you, and you'd have to go through the whole process again. And by that time, well, the graduation is done, and you didn't get to graduate. Now this does not happen in school, but this is a metaphorical way of putting how the visa processing goes. And well, I'm now at the spec-and-crease-return policy of the teacher. So it does suck to be me.